End the month on a smile! The power of the smile lets us move through the slog of discontent and despair or discouragement. A smile turns on the power of abundance, harmony, and healing.
A smile is the tool that lets us redeem ourselves from what ever darkness tries to overwhelm us. Remember that you have the power to change how you feel. It is like turning on a light! Smile.
Many blessings.
This blog was written originally in 2011. I have only used part of it as the rest was too dated for this coming year. I hope you enjoy it!
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For those of you that have asked questions about how to set your intentions for 2018, I would like to share a beautiful ritual that one of my friends sent to me several years ago.
I do not use this at New Years, however, this ritual is certainly right for that purpose. I do use it to set intentions for any time. It is powerful to use this ritual with the New Moon.
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This is the initial technique - Setting Your Intentions for 2018 or any other time:
You start by asking yourself 4 questions...
Then you write your answers. I feel into my body to identify in my heart what I am being drawn to create from the year. The MOST IMPORTANT part is to write it as if it has already happened.
As an example / template, here is an excerpt in part of what Maureen Collins (an artist) wrote for the category of business:
I am so grateful that this year became such an amazing journey of openness and discovery in my business, as it moved into the corporate world and lecture stage larger than ever before. I was able to deliver my shared vision via “What If? The Movie” through divine energy to hundreds of thousands of souls that were not only open to the information but contributed to the content collectively... AND they further delivered it to many more through word of mouth. This wisdom known to us all was a huge success with so many experiencing heart felt shifts and changes through the material offered by many like-minded souls. It became a place of safety and conversation for all who viewed it, and grew to include new audiences of those opening to the materials being offered by me and other contributors. The opportunity for the community to converse with one another about their own positive belief and pattern changes was a blessing and a joy to my heart, showing me the possibilities for all communities of the world. I loved watching and hearing the shifts and changes clients and friends and family were experiencing as they also awakened to how amazing and powerful they truly are, and reveled in the moments they shared with others in the community ...which triggered more openings and shifts and more sharing and so on. What fun... and so effortless and flowing... I felt like a kid again with all the discoveries...
You get the idea... write it as if it has already happened AND makes sure you include how you "felt" when it happened. Do this for each of the categories (there may be some overlap but the categories are designed to allow for specifics in those four areas of your life). This is a POWERFUL exercise that almost acts as plan for the year but flows through and creates a vibrational resonance with what you are desiring. You can do this over the next couple of days... I promise you it will really make a lovely impact. Then print it out post a couple of copies in places you will regularly see them to remind you what you are creating.
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Ritual: Burn and Release from Maureen Collins…
On a sheet of paper, I write out all of the things from the current year that I've outgrown, no longer want in my life, no longer work for me, and anything else I feel I want to shed and leave behind. On a separate piece of paper, I write all of the things I can think of and feel that I want to grow and expand in the new year. I then burn each paper in separate dishes or shells, making sure all pieces are turned to ashes. Then, when cooled, I put them into separate envelopes or containers (film canister, Ziploc baggie, etc.) and mark "to shed" and "to grow" on the container. Around 5 minutes before midnight, I start visualizing all the things on the "to shed" list, and see them slip away, see them blown away and washed away, out of my energy field, out of my life and out of my reality. I go out side and pour the "to shed" ashes into my hand and let the wind scatter the ashes away and release them and all they re present, as the old year fades away.
After midnight, after blessing the new year, with the second container "to grow", I visualize all of these goals, desires, etc. coming to fruition, to this level of reality. I bring that envelope down to the garden, and with a stick dig a small hole, then plant these ashes in the earth, near a tree or in a special place, (for those in apartments, I encourage them to use their favorite houseplant). The ashes are a reminder of the life cycle, the power of nature and the honoring of Mother Earth, that these seeds of hopes and dreams are nurtured into reality, in the coming year. This is a ritual that I've shared with many people, and even had a group in Ireland do it one New Years! You may want to try this and tweak it and do it a way that suits you.
Many blessings for 2018
If you are getting ready to host a New Year's Eve party, you may want to add these delightful Tourtiere Rolls to your hors d'ouvres menu. They have quite a few ingredients, but are easy to make. If you want to do vegan, mash up mushrooms or black beans as a substitute for the meat.
Enjoy.
1/2 284-mL can water chestnuts, drained
2 tsp butter
1 small onion, finely chopped
500 g ground chicken, turkey or pork
3/4 tsp salt
1/2 tsp dried thyme leaves
1/4 tsp ground cloves
1/4 tsp cinnamon
1/4 tsp dried sage leaves
1/4 tsp freshly ground black pepper
4 green onions
2 celery stalk
1 egg
1/2 cup sour cream, preferably not light
1/4 cup chopped fresh parsley
6 sheets phyllo pastry
1/3 cup butter, melted
fresh thyme leaves, or finely chopped fresh parsley (optional)
Keep some appetizers in the freezer and ready to cook for last-minute guests. We’ve paired savoury Canadian tourtière filling with Mediterranean pastry for a crunchy bite in these hors d’oeuvres.
Prepare rolls up to point of baking. Freeze rolls on baking sheet until firm, then store, layered, in an airtight container or freezer bag. To bake, do not thaw. Spread out frozen rolls on a baking sheet. Bake according to recipe, but frozen rolls will take a few minutes longer.
Many blessings.
Have you ever notices how much people want to give you advice? Have you ever noticed how often the advice does not make sense to what is going on in your life? Have you ever wondered just why people seem to want to give you advice and then get mad because you don’t take it?
It seems especially around Christmas that advice flows out of people as frequently as the snow that falls in the North. And, the advice is often so detailed, one wonders how much time the other person has on their hands. I am not saying that all advice is worthless or bad. In fact, some advice can change one’s life. I guess the biggest issue is that most advice is unsolicited. What is it that makes others want to interfere/intercede in your life? I am saying that when one wants advice, they usually ask for it.
The Angels tell us that giving advice all the time is a method of gaining influence or control over another. Rather than being content to manage one’s own life, advice givers have a need to “prove” that they are knowledgeable and know more than you do. The other part of giving advice is to show you as weak and incompetent.
The best option for dealing with people that hand out that never ending stream of advice is to limit your time with them, and even cut off contact with them. If you need to maintain contact, simply tell them that you will take the advice and consider it, and then let it go. If the person giving advice persists, that is often an indication that they have another agenda other than your well-being.
Many blessings.
My wish for you is that you have the most wonderful Christmas with your friends and family. I wish that your days are filled with kindness and with thoughtfulness. I hope that you find time to practice self care and to be caring to all.
Many blessings.
As we come closer to the day of Christmas, I find myself asking for calm spirit. I feel the energies from outside me, pushing at me, causing me to feel unsettled.
I ask for calm spirit. I wish to glide through the days with everything that I do being easily accomplished. I wish for all that I meet to smile at me and wish me well.
I ask for calm spirit. I ask for inspiration from the sky and the stars. I ask for my identity to be Calm Spirit Woman so that I am at one with the flow of what happens next.
I ask for calm spirit. I am oneness with everyone out there, with every person around me. I see them in me. I move to calmness. I am refreshed.
Many blessings.
A common Christmas carols says – Peace on Earth, Goodwill to man – I think it is from "I Heard the Bells on Christmas Day". The song was on the car radio. I started thinking… peace. For many it means no war or persecution. For others, it means not having to deal with anything that is drama or is negative.
I like this poster that says, and I paraphrase, peace is being calm in your heart. That feels right.
Many blessings.
Just being more conscious of one's self will make this Christmas a much easier time for you. The list above is to stick on your fridge, or in your wallet so that you don't forget. Too often, we forget that if we don't care for self first, no one else will do it for us. No one can sleep more for us, or drink more water for us. Others cannot exercise for us or relax us. Those things must come from inside us.
Make a pledge to yourself that this Christmas season, you will be kind to yourself first, and then kind to others.
Many blessings.
I had been out for the evening and was driving home when I noticed all the decorated trees along the boulevard and streets. Extremely tall pine trees, apple trees, oak trees, and all kinds of bushes were dressed up in sparkling lights. Some were colored and some were white. I thought about how peaceful the glowing trees made the drive. They made me feel as though they were lighting the way home.
I know that is fanciful. However the trees seemed to be linked, perhaps by the lights or perhaps by the mood. It felt like the trees were representing Nature and offering more light to us at a time of year when many feel stressed and even depressed.
I think that the lights at Christmas are a way of "Light-ening" the mood for everyone.
Many blessings.
It seems that life is busy and that busy-ness is complicated by Christmas. The Angels tell us that we are doing more instead of being more. What they mean is that we are caught up in the tasks and by doing more, we don't have to be introspective and think about the things that hold us back, or cause us grief, or....
The Angels say that each of us is growing, a little bit at a time, and that Christmas is the perfect time to practice giving, kindness, mindfulness, and to practice giving hope to others with thoughtful actions.
My plan for today and until Christmas is to try to slow down and to be more mindful when I do a task or activity. I will see how far I grow.
Many blessings.
When all your family and friends are coming home for the holidays, it is time to make this easy, delightful fudge for sharing while you stroll down memory lane. This recipe is still a favorite in our family.
Chocolate Peanut Butter Fudge
As this is easy to make, it is a great gift for those folks who "have everything". It is like a warm hug.
Many blessings.
As we move through the activities that take us up to Christmas, we are often stuck in situations where nothing seems right – we just cannot find the right gift. Or, we cannot make the right cookies… or, we cannot get everything done.
The only way to get through the daunting tasks is to remember that "often the last key in the bunch opens the lock". What this means is that one cannot give up. One must keep trying until they are successful. A locked door remains locked until the key is found.
It is during the tough, mental times that we need to be grateful that we are getting this chance to grow and expand our thoughts. We receive new guidance from our Angels in the form of inspiration. Hope springs anew as we find better ways to problem solve. And as always, we need to be mindful of our actions.
Many blessings.
This is the time of year when many friends and family choose to die and leave the planet. We said good bye to someone we love very much on Sunday.
The instant that a life passes, everything is different. Changes happen to help us grow, and to find ways to cope with new experiences.
Our Ancestors learned to say good bye early in life because the life span was not very long. They were strengthened by the passing, and they honored their ancestral folks once a year.
We do not have a practice for bringing our deceased relatives or other loved ones into our daily life, in the 21st century. Perhaps it is time that we find a way to give death a respectful place in our daily rituals.
Grief is the by product when a being leaves. It is like a winter storm, it has to run its course and run itself out. It is intense and violent, and then drifts into calm.
Beginnings happen after every big change. We map out a new course of being, and then we move on with our life. Over time, the sense of loss does ease, but the hole in one's life is always there.
Healing, it is said, is a product of who we are, and what our faith is. Healing takes time. It cannot be forced. When it is finally complete, there is a sense of rightness. That rightness may take years to achieve. It is as it is.
Many blessings.
In our house, when I was growing up, a favorite cookie that only appeared at Christmas, was the big ginger cookie. We loved it!
For those of you that want a special treat to pack up in a cookie box and give as a treat, I highly recommend this recipe.
Big Soft Ginger Cookies
Preheat oven to 350 degrees F (175 degrees C). Sift together the flour, ginger, baking soda, cinnamon, cloves, and salt. Set aside.
Enjoy the cookies.
Many blessings.
This blog is a repeat of the one published on December 1, 2008.
This is the first day of December - a signal to us that Christmas is twenty-four days away! Do you know the following things about December?
1. The Moon celebration is called "The Moon of Long Nights".
2. During this time, the water is believed to be revitalized.
3. The event of Winter Solstice, held on either December 21st or 22nd depending on the length of the year. This honours the longest night and the return of the Sun Goddess, Lucina.
4. Our Ancestors thought that December was a time to endure, for the elderly to die, and for the world, and their life, to be reborn.
5. During this cold time of December, our Ancestors spent time on introspection and renewal - weaving new clothes, creating new tools, honoring the Gods and Goddesses.
6. It is common for people to use this time as time of purification. People have saunas and roll in the snow. Others participate in sweat lodges. Some simply steam. The hot and the cold are the balance to purify our bodies.
7. The trees that we honor at this time are the family of evergreens - pine trees will be decorated for Christmas
8. The colour traditionally associated with Christmas was dark red.
Many blessings.
This activity list can be a motivator, or a reminder, that there are things that you can do every day to make your life wonderful and joyful.
Try to do do one activity a day for a month. Note any changes in your journal so you can go back and see the change.
Namaste.
Today, do one kind thing for someone else – someone that you do not know. Then, do one kind thing for someone that you do know.
Namaste.
The place of joy is different for each of us, yet the emotion is the same. Joy lets you forget about the sadness and hurt and all the things that we call "negative.".
Joy can be so beautiful that it can make you laugh, giggle, feel carefree, and even cry – for joy. What an awesome emotion!
Pull up JOY in your self today and see how it improves your well being.
Namaste.
Here is another list to stick on your computer monitor or on your fridge or even on your mirror. It is a simple reminder that we can let go of our ego and listen with our heart.
When we listen with our heart, it is easy to be kind, happy, and in harmony with the world.
Namaste.
When we are grounded, we have the feeling of being home. Home is being at peace within yourself and within your world. Grounding happens when you connect with the richness of the Earth.
Grounding allows us to:
Namaste
This Autumn Blessing is a good way to do some clean up of some of the toxic energies that you may have been releasing for the past several weeks.
Print out the blessing and read it to yourself, out loud, looking into a mirror, so you can see yourself as you read it.
It will surprise you just how much clearing happens.
Namaste
Often we write lists and notes for ourselves so that we don't forget something important. The list above is a great post-it note to stick on your fridge or your computer monitor to remind you that there is more to life than what we focus on.
Gratitude – being grateful – is a characteristic that all of us need to work on. It does not seem to come naturally.
Kindness – being kind to all – is a gift to yourself as well as others. Hearing the words, "You are very kind", is a boost to well being.
Namaste.
It seems funny that plants and animals can accept the changes that happen in their lives but that humans cannot accept change.
Change is such a part of everything, it is puzzling that humans are so resistant to it.
If things did not change, we would be stuck doing one thing, one way, all of our life.
That would truly be monotonous and prevent us from growing by learning new things.
Be grateful for the abundance of change.
Namaste.
When people ask us in our early life what we want to be when we grow up, they are not usually doing us a kindness. For some reason, people need to have labels based on career to attach to others. It seems to be how the world is organized.
The fun part about life is that when we move through life without fighting it, the harmony of the world becomes available to us. We have inspiration and courage and compassion. We do not feel overwhelmed.
Letting go is about getting past obstacles.
Namaste.
When we let go of control, we find that life flows more smoothly. Unexpected, miraculous things happen. Letting go is learning about the flow of life. When life seems hard and it seems there are huge obstacles, then we know that we are on a path that hasn't been cleared for us.
When we are on the correct path for us, things are smooth. There is a sense of timelessness about what happens. We are filled with hope. We notice the earth changes and liken them to how our life is changing.
When we are journeying through life, and we can see the destination, we know all is right. We feel calm and at peace.
Namaste
Because we all believe in cause and effect, we are convinced that everything that happens has a purpose. Maybe it does have a purpose. However, sometimes things happen so far in advance of the event that they influence that we cannot see the cause and effect. Think a butterfly flapping its wings in Brazil and a storm in England.
We do not have a broad enough vision to see everything and to understand everything. Accepting that we cannot know everything allows us to be at peace with seemingly random events.
We can say good-bye to analyzing life to pieces and say hello to accepting the beauty and the abundance and all the things that are sent our way.
Namaste
Some folks have asked for help in releasing things. This brilliant short prayer is about releasing from your life and asking to be released from other people's lives.
It is a prayer of creativity and expansion that allows you to heal parts of your life that seemed beyond healing. At the end of the prayer, you can add the phrase – With harm to no one – and know that this request is in the highest and best interest of all.
Namaste.
Today is the time to remember that you are unique. What you do, how you do it, and why you do it, are all part of who you are. Not anyone else can be you.
So, it is important that you do not let others try to change you by giving you what they believe is well intended advice. Take everything in, examine it, and then let it go.
We all have talents that make us who we are. Today is a good day to practice those talents.
Namaste.
As November kicks off, people in the Northern Hemisphere are settling in for Winter with its cold and snow and Christmas preparations.
November is a good month for practicing "letting go" of things, feelings, and family/friends that no longer serve you. Note that serve does not mean in the sense that they are your servants but in the sense that they do not provide any support or encouragement in your life. If the person makes your life more difficult by demanding that you do this or that, then that person has an agenda that excludes any benefit to you.
For example, if you want to do something like take art classes and those around you tell you that it is a waste of money or that you do not have talent, then they are an example of someone that does not serve you. Their most common comeback for what they say is, "I am just looking out for your best interest". This is a falsehood because it would be in your best interest to experience something new. They don't want you to move ahead or progress so they make up reasons to hold you back.
Namaste
There are lots of healing modalities available for anyone to try. Some modalities offer classes so that you can learn to do deeper self healing. Some modalities require practitioners to work their expertise on your body/mind.
Regardless of the modality that you choose, spend some time exploring it.
Some of my favorite methods of healing are:
Try to find the things that make your heart sing, and follow them.
Namaste.
Life is about moving forward. It is hard to move forward when you are ill, or in despair, or depressed, or fighting an injury, or living with PSTD, or…..
All of those things interfere with life. They make us stuck. Healing is about being unstuck.
Like the poster says, we need so many people that are able to heal with their art, peaceful ways, stories, love, and with their helping hands.
You can choose what you want to be.
Namaste.
The theme of healing comes about because most of us are just not very good at self care. Oh, we may hit the gym and run and do strenuous workouts as part of what we believe is self care, because others have told us that it is. However, self care is about taking care of your bodies – physical, mental, emotional, and spiritual.
I love the meditation in the poster above.
Try it.
Namaste.
Listening to two young women talking about changing their lives. The phrase that pops up over and over is, "where do I start?".
The answer is always – not where – when do you start? Now! Today! This is the day to make changes. This is the day to explore. This is the day to be grateful. This is the day that abundance will bring you more. This is the day to be you.
Namaste.
Some people believe that for healing to occur, the healing must be done within a group setting. The belief is that the power of each individual combines to create a massive healing energy that transforms everyone in the group.
The group does not have to be large. A common setting for group healing is a group meditation. The words of the meditation have an influence on the process as do the thoughts/intentions/energy of the participants.
There are many testimonials from people that have had remarkable healings through a group session.
Remember, the information in this blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider for a medical condition.
Namaste.
The part of healing that western medicine seems to ignore is the energetic healing of the body. The beauty of the energy healing practice, like Reiki, is that it heals the physical, the emotional, the spiritual, and the mental (mind). Energy practitioners will tell you that when one of these areas is out of balance, you are not well because you are out of balance.
The word Reiki is made of two Japanese words - Rei which means "God's Wisdom or the Higher Power" and Ki which is "life force energy". So Reiki is actually "spiritually guided life force energy." (from http://www.reiki.org/faq/whatisreiki.html)
There are many Reiki practitioners and there are several schools of Reiki.. all good. Reiki classes are available to those who wish to work on some self healing.
Several years ago, on a Saturday morning, I was in a bicycle accident when the trail we were riding crumbled beneath me and dropped me and my bike about eight feet down into a creek bed, amongst trees that had been chewed off by beavers. I dislocated my shoulder and had massive bruises and several pulled muscles. Four Reiki sessions over Saturday and Sunday had me mobile and able to go to work on Monday morning.
Remember, the information in this blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider for a medical condition.
Namaste.
This is the positive talk that we all need to be saying to ourselves everyday! Throw out the negative talk.
We can be our own healers with positive talk.
Namaste
A powerful form of healing is chanting. Many of us do this unconsciously when we hum. Mothers hum to their babies and young children. We hum to ourselves in times of stress or of happiness.
A common spiritual chant is OM (AUM). This sound – the OM sound – was sung in the original pitch of 136 Hz, so that the power of Om, as it resonates with the Earth's own frequency (https://www.mindbodygreen.com/0-2776/5-Facts-You-May-Not-Know-About-OM.html)
There are many chants that one can repeat for calming, healing, nurturing, or for praying. Try several – you can listen to them on YouTube – and then stick with one, repeating it three times a day for 21 days. You will see a difference.
Namaste.
One of the healing methodologies that seems to bring peace and quiet for many seeking healing is horse therapy.
Horse therapy has worked for individuals with the following health issues:
You can find listings for equine facilitated wellness in your area. The horses are used to help re-establish your power, and to help you find your voice.
Remember, the information in this blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider for a medical condition.
Namaste.
Healers have been telling the world for the last several hundred years that each human has the power to do self healing. The medical profession has disagreed, saying that if one is not medically trained then the patient cannot possibly heal themselves.
In a recent article http://returntonow.net/2017/07/16/placebo-effect-proves-can-heal-minds/, the writer lists several experiments that show individuals do the healing, rather than a form of medicine.
From the article:
In a documentary called The Power of Thought
, stem-cell biologist Dr. Bruce Lipton estimates at least a third of all healings – including those involving drugs, surgery and all other allopathic treatment – have nothing to do with the treatment itself, but everything to do with the patient’s belief in the treatment.
The placebo effect, as defined by Google, is a “beneficial effect, produced by a placebo drug or treatment that cannot be attributed to the properties of the placebo itself, and must therefore be due to the patient’s belief in that treatment.”
What this means is that you can find a way to heal an ailment.
Remember, the information in this blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider for a medical condition.
Namaste.
We all have a running dialogue with ourselves. The key is to make sure that the dialogue is positive and reinforcing. Unfortunately, many of us have a negative self talk where we berate ourselves or punish ourselves with words.
The following exercise comes from http://self-compassion.org/exercise-5-changing-critical-self-talk/
This exercise should be done over several weeks and will eventually form the blueprint for changing how you relate to yourself long-term. Some people find it useful to work on their inner critic by writing in a journal. Others are more comfortable doing it via internal dialogues. If you are someone who likes to write things down and revisit them later, journaling can be an excellent tool for transformation. If you are someone (like me) who never manages to be consistent with a journal, then do whatever works for you. You can speak aloud to yourself, or think silently.
- The first step towards changing the way to treat yourself is to notice when you are being self-critical. It may be that – like many of us — your self-critical voice is so common for you that you don’t even notice when it is present. Whenever you’re feeling bad about something, think about what you’ve just said to yourself. Try to be as accurate as possible, noting your inner speech verbatim. What words do you actually use when you’re self-critical? Are there key phrases that come up over and over again? What is the tone of your voice – harsh, cold, angry? Does the voice remind you of any one in your past who was critical of you? You want to be able to get to know the inner self-critic very well, and to become aware of when your inner judge is active. For instance, if you’ve just eaten half a box of Oreo’s, does your inner voice say something like “you’re so disgusting,” “you make me sick,” and so on? Really try to get a clear sense of how you talk to yourself.
- Make an active effort to soften the self-critical voice, but do so with compassion rather than self-judgment (I.e., don’t say “you’re such a bitch” to your inner critic!). Say something like “I know you’re worried about me and feel unsafe, but you are causing me unnecessary pain. Could you let my inner compassionate self say a few words now?”
- Reframe the observations made by your inner critic in a friendly, positive way. If you’re having trouble thinking of what words to use, you might want to imagine what a very compassionate friend would say to you in this situation. It might help to use a term of endearment that strengthens expressed feelings of warmth and care (but only if it feels natural rather than schmaltzy.) For instance, you can say something like “Darling, I know you ate that bag of cookies because you’re feeling really sad right now and you thought it would cheer you up. But you feel even worse and are not feeling good in your body. I want you to be happy, so why don’t you take a long walk so you feel better?” While engaging in this supportive self-talk, you might want to try gently stroking your arm, or holding your face tenderly in your hands (as long as no one’s looking). Physical gestures of warmth can tap into the caregiving system even if you’re having trouble calling up emotions of kindness at first, releasing oxytocin that will help change your bio-chemistry. The important thing is that you start acting kindly, and feelings of true warmth and caring will eventually follow.
Namaste
Life is about exploring new things, practicing skills to become masterful at them, and its about meeting new people and having new experiences.
What do you do if your life has a toxic situation in it – for example a toxic person or toxic group? Well, you need to let go of them. How do you recognize these people?
Qualities of a Toxic Person
Life coach Cheryl Richardson describes five types of toxic qualities in people:
- Blamer (keeps complaining)
- Drainer (always needs you and contacts you only when he needs you)
- Shamer (keeps criticising you)
- Discounter (discounts or challenges everything you say)
- Gossip (keeps talking about others at their back)
If he/she is any or all of the above, you just get him/her out of your life, please. (From https://thoughtcatalog.com/surabhi-surendra/2016/08/this-is-how-you-let-go-of-a-toxic-relationship/)
Why You Need to Let A Toxic Person Go
The following advice comes from https://tinybuddha.com/blog/letting-go-of-unhealthy-relationships-and-rediscovering-yourself/.
If you, like me, have considered letting someone go, ask yourself these questions:
How do you feel in their presence: drained or alive? Does the person always have your best interests in mind? Do they belittle you when you share your feelings? Do they make promises and never follow up?
If you answered yes to the final two questions, it might be time to move on to make space in your life for healthy, happy relationships.
The Process of Letting Go Of A Toxic Relationship
(From https://tinybuddha.com/blog/letting-go-of-unhealthy-relationships-and-rediscovering-yourself/)
Focus on one relationship that’s draining you and write a letter to the person you want to let go. Pour out your feelings onto the paper. The letter can be as long or short as you want.
End the letter with, “I release you across all space and time. Thank you for helping me learn and grow.” Fold the paper, burn it, and bury it in the ground to signify a complete release to the universe. This particular ritual is magical. I instantly start to feel lighter.
Physical cleaning is so helpful when you are letting go of the past. Our physical space is a representation of what we’re giving space in our life.
Sell or donate any gifts you received, and burn any letters from the person you’re tying to let go. You’re going to face a lot of resistance; you’ll come up with reasons to hold on to these things. Remind yourself that this crucial to moving on and feeling happier with yourself and your life.
Write down how you want to feel in your life and within your relationships.
This is how I want my life and relationships to feel:
If you’re not sure how you want to feel on the whole, start with just the immediate future. How do you want to feel this month?
Now that you’ve created space by releasing unhealthy relationships, write a list of activities that will help you feel and experience your desires. For example, you could join a dance group to feel alive.
Put a little time into your passion every day. Writing makes me come alive, so I make sure to write daily.
As you start dedicating time to things that are important to you, the right people will come into your life—people who see and appreciate you for who you really are.
~~
Namaste.
It may seem to readers that have been following this blog for the past couple of days that the theme seems to be SELF LOVE. That is true. However, there are so many aspects to the harm that we do to ourselves that we need many ways of undoing the harm, and many ways to promote healing. One of the most common destructive emotions I see in clients is resentment.
I like this exercise on releasing resentment. It appears in many books and articles. The exercise write up comes from the blog http://indigointentions.com/a-quick-exercise-to-dissolve-resentment.htm.
Dissolving Resentment
Dissolving resentment can be simple, not easy but simple. One of the best exercises I have used in my own life and offered to my clients is an exercise that Louise Hay shares in her book, “You Can Heal Your Life” and she point out that this is an old Emmet Fox exercise that helps to dissolve resentment. Since it helps to dissolve the resentment, it will also help you in forgiving others and in forgiving yourself.
Remember, the information in this blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider for a medical condition.
Namaste.
Happy Thanksgiving to all beings.
The following prayer of gratitude comes from the site https://programminglife.net/6-beautiful-prayers-of-gratitude/. Enjoy.
We return thanks to our mother, the earth, which sustains us.
We return thanks to the rivers and streams, which supply us with waters.
We return thanks to all herbs, which furnish medicine for the cure of our diseases.
We return thanks to the corn, and to her sisters, the beans and the squashes, which give us life.
We return thanks to the wind, which moving the air has banished diseases.
We return thanks to the moon and the stars,
which have given us their light when the sun was gone.
We return thanks to the sun, that he has looked upon the earth with a beneficent eye.
Lastly, we return thanks to the Great Spirit, in whom is embodied all goodness, and who directs all things for the good of his children.
Namaste.
The Hawaiians' have a practice that allows them to clear themselves of issues. The following definition of Ho'oponopono comes from Uplift Connect at http://upliftconnect.com/hawaiian-practice-of-forgiveness/.
What is ho’oponopono?
On the surface level, many people have understood ho’oponopono to be a mantra where one repeats the words ‘I’m sorry, please forgive me, thank you, I love you’ as a form of mental and spiritual cleaning that could be compared to Buddhist techniques for clearing karma. It has been defined as a forgiveness and reconciliation practice, cleansing of ‘errors of thought’ – the origin of problems and sickness in the physical world, according the the Hawaiian worldview. The literal translation is ‘to put to right; to put in order or shape, correct, revise, adjust, amend, regulate, arrange, rectify, tidy up, make orderly or neat.”
The process that you can use is neatly summarized in the website at http://www.ancienthuna.com/ho-oponopono.htm.
Try the process and see how it works for you.
The Process of Ho'oponopono:
Remember, the information in this blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider for a medical condition.
Namaste.
Sometimes, we get into a self destructive rut where we have a fear that we cannot control, and in trying to quiet the fear, we end up doing other damage to ourselves. Sharon Salzberg, Buddhist teacher has a great blog about exactly this phenomenon at https://onbeing.org/blog/sharon-salzberg-a-standing-meditation-for-self-care/.
The following meditation exercise comes from Sharon's blog and will help one with regaining self love.
Standing meditation to take a stand for self-love
I recommend doing standing meditation barefoot, as you will have a greater sensitivity to your sense of balance and the micro-sensations happening in your muscles and skin. But if it is more comfortable, wear socks or comfortable shoes.
Remember, the information in this blog is not intended to be a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek the advice of your physician or other qualified health provider for a medical condition.
Namaste.
Science has proven that our physical body can heal itself. When the physical body does not heal, some doctors believe it is because the organ or area damaged has a memory of trauma that stops it from regenerating. To help our body heal, we need to undo the trauma that it is storing in its memory cells.
Sometimes, the trauma is caused by the painful memories. Have a look at the following information from www.GoodTherapy.org, which is an excerpt of information from Hardwiring Happiness: The New Brain Science of Contentment, Calm, and Confidence, by neuropsychologist Rick Hanson. (link to the whole article https://www.goodtherapy.org/blog/four-steps-to-erasing-trauma-of-painful-memories-061214)
How to HEAL
Based on the latest in neuroscience finds Rick Hanson offers a simple, yet effective, method for rewiring the brain from the negative emotions associated with trauma to the positive emotions associated with health and wellness. In his book, he describes a four step process using the acronym HEAL.
Step 1 activates a positive mental state, and steps 2, 3, and 4 install it in your brain. In step 1 we notice a positive experience that’s already present in the foreground or background of your awareness. In the example I offered at the beginning, I tuned into an experience where I felt safe and supported, and brought to mind experiences of safety and security.
Too often we spend minutes, and sometimes hours and days, ruminating over a negative experience, but we gloss over the positive. Here we take time to deepen the positive experience. I would open myself to the feelings of support I have in my life. I would picture and my wife and friends and the many supports I have, filling my inner conscious with at least 10 to 20 seconds of positive memory.
Here we imagine ourselves drinking in the experience. I imagine all my cells being infused with the experience. I feel it sinking into me and becoming part of my brain and all the parts of my being.
Hanson describes this as an optional step. We don’t want to become overwhelmed by the negative, but to hold the negative in consciousness while it is infused with the positive. Hanson uses the image of a garden. We imagine the beauty of beautiful flowers we are planting. We become aware of the weeds and gently pull them out so there’s room for growth. He concludes by saying, “Whenever you want, let go of all negative material and rest only in the positive. Then, to continue uprooting the negative material, a few times over the next hour be aware of only neutral or positive things that may have been associated with the negative.
Remember, this information is not meant to replace or refute any advice from a physician or medical expert.
Namaste.
