What is a Mirror?

"A pond of reflection in Fish Creek Provincial Park"

©2007 Judith Hirst-Joyeux

Most people will have experienced a time when someone came into their life that they just didn't like.  The categories of dislike may be - the swearing, the judgemental attitude, the victim mentality, the smugness, the "know-it-all" persona, and, the list goes on.  In discussion with others, this difficult person in your life is said to be a mirror - a mirror for you!  Why is a person a mirror and what does anyone need a mirror for?

The most common meaning of mirror is " a polished surface that forms images by reflecting light ".  We all use mirrors to check our appearances and to do our hair and/or makeup.  We check the mirror to ascertain how others will see us.  That thought brings up an interesting point.  A folk truth is a saying, "the best mirror is an old friend" which means a friend will usually give a person a faithful depiction or reflection of how others see the person in the spotlight.  However, everyone will very often tell a wee, white lie about appearances or other things, to avoid hurting the friend's feelings.  The friend quite often, does not hear the truth.

This is where the person that is "difficult to like" comes into one's life.  We cannot depend on our family and friends to give us absolute honesty because their honesty will be tainted with "I know what is best for you". So Great Spirit sends in people that reflect those things one does that are not likeable or that are selfish or even mean.  What ever behaviour causes an emotion like anger, disgust, or outrage, means that the behaviour is in one's self, and now is the time to take it off the mental shelf and look at the root cause. 

As the pond above reflects back the image of the banks and foliage around it, the people around us reflect back our behaviour.  It is not about right and wrong.  It is about seeing where our own behaviour holds us back.  It is about saying, "Ahhhh!  I see how I practice a pattern or behaviour or action or belief that does limit me, and may make others less tolerant of me."  This is a huge step in one's self development.  We have been raised in a society were it is the norm to be critical and to find fault or to find someone to blame.  To look to ourselves, to accept responsibility for our actions means that the mirror has done its work.  If the wind was blowing around us on a walk, we would look in the mirror as soon as we were inside, and we would fix whatever mess our hair was in.  We may blame the wind, but we still need to fix our hair.  If the people around us reflect something we don't like in ourselves, we can fix that too. 

May all reflections show you smiling!

Judy

(www.angelsandancestors.com)