Ancestors Speak – How to Overcome Helplessness

Picture of clouds lifting from Microsoft Clip Art…

 

 

Several weeks ago, I hosted a radio show titled – WHO AM I, A CHANCE TO CHECK IN ON YOU.  I have received comments and emails about the show.  One of the items that people wanted to have written out is the section on “How To Overcome Helplessness”. 

Here, then, is the information that I used on the show.  It comes from a book Helplessness by Martin E. P. Seligman.  If you feel helpless or you have someone that you see as helpless or powerless in your life, try this, and read the book.

“Helplessness, then, can be recognized by:

1. Lack of motivation, listlessness.
2. Cognitive breakdown between actions and outcomes - inability to link actions to the consequences they bring about - also manifests as blaming others or external factors for your situation, condition, and outcomes.
3. Negative emotions: boredom, anxiety, frustration, anger, hopelessness, depression (sometimes suicidal).

Apply this procedure to cure helplessness:

1. Recognize your helplessness, lack of motivation, listlessness.
2. Recognize that as a baby and subsequently you've had many experiences where you were unable to control consequences or outcomes.
3. Recognize your negative emotions: boredom, anxiety, frustration, anger, hopelessness, depression. Acknowledge them to yourself, for example, by saying, "I recognize that I feel helpless, hopeless, and depressed."
4. Consciously and deliberately choose to experience any or all of these emotions. Make a cognitive link between that choice and what you experience, for example, by saying to yourself, "I consciously decide to feel helpless, hopeless, and depressed. Therefore I feel helpless, hopeless, and depressed."
5. Perform a simple action such as washing the dishes or combing your hair. Observe the consequences or outcome. Form a cognitive link between your action and its outcome. (Examples below.)
6. Divide a sheet of paper into three columns. In the second column list both positive and negative outcomes you've experienced during the past 24 hours, including emotions. In the first column write down your corresponding actions or inactions that preceded those outcomes. In the third column write down the causal or cognitive links between actions/inactions and outcomes. Consider only your own actions and inactions. (How to express the causal or cognitive link is explained below.)
7. Don't blame others or external factors for anything.
8. Pat yourself on the back for all the positive consequences you did produce.”  - from Helplessness by Martin E. P. Seligman

Judy@angelsandancestors.com  Let me know if this is helpful!